I have been sad, and often dismayed, at the results of elections.  Never have I felt like this.  The loss of the love of my life pales in comparison to what I feel about this election.  I have gone so far as to write letters about why I believe it's fraudulent and I will continue to do what I can.  I'm scared.  If the election is honest then what am I to believe about the people who perpetuated it by electing a dishonest, racist, cheating, meglomaniac.  Actually, I'm going to post my letter in the next blog so you will understand the bredth of my angst.  

I am a 68 year old retired nurse.  I also have a bachelors degree in political science.  Throughout my lifetime I have been interested in the activity of government and have watched elections closely.  As a Democrat, I have sometimes been happy and sometimes sad and dismayed.  This time, however, I am really frightened.  We have supposedly elected a narcissistic  megalomaniac.  I say “supposedly” because I do not believe in the outcome of this election.  I am not paranoid or a conspiracy theorist, but I do believe our election was tampered with.  

Probably what bothers me the most is his ranting, before the election, about how the process was rigged and he wouldn't accept the outcome.  We, of course, thought he was crazy.  When Hillary Clinton was defeated, she followed the path of all great statesmen and conceded with grace.  President Obama was also gracious and helpful.  Both of them believed he had won fair and square and didn’t want to be seen ranting and raving about an unfair election.  

To begin with, I know polls can be wrong, but exit polls are more accurate and all favored Hillary Clinton.  In my heart of hearts I couldn’t believe that the American people could elect someone who had cheated on his taxes, discriminated in his rental practices, ran an illegal foundation, and worst of all, harassed and abused women.  He also has no experience in government and is clearly not a critical thinker.  

The system of checks and balances on which our government is based, will disappear with his appointment of a Supreme Court Judge. Then he and his friend Putin, will be in the driver’s seat.  Think about it.  His main supporters are uneducated white men who are heavily armed.  They remind me of the brown shirts in Hitlers rise to power.  

I have no power and only a small voice so I rely on others to carry the message. Our only chance of correcting this travesty is to prove that he and/or Putin tampered with the election before the inauguration.  You know the Russians have the capability, so let’s get busy finding the proof we need.  Our country deserves a president who is worthy of the office. 

I've added all my new paintings, one of which I just finished yesterday.  In between I'm working on some animal pictures for my daughters.  They are really hard, but I'm motivated to do it for them.  Exploring all kinds of methods and subjects has refired my interest in painting.  It's pretty nice.  Now if this fucking election would just end......

I've been painting.  It all started with a comment a friend made at my class reunion.  I showed him a self portrait drawing that I had made.  He asked, "Are you going to paint that?"  I hadn't thought of it before then, but one of the first things I did was get out an old canvas and start painting.   I have never done portraits and it's incredibly difficult.  The first rendition looked like a zombie, but I really was enjoying the process.  So I decided to paint a portrait of my oldest daughter.  She looked like a zombie too, but I finally discovered that it was the skin and shadow tint.  I'm still working on it, but I'm happy with the face.  Then I was able to go back and un-zombie mine.  It took a couple tries, but I think it's OK.  I was waiting for it to dry before adding the wrinkles.....  I posted it under new work at the bottom of the list, but I can't get the damned thing to rotate so it's sideways.  

I've also been trying to produce a painting for my niece.  I may have to start from scratch, but I altered a couple of canvases that I wasn't totally happy with and painted over an old one.  They are listed at the top of my "recent work".  I'm painting again and that in itself is pretty damned wonderful.  Speaking of which, the day is passing and I had better get to the studio.  

Last night I watched a program on OPB about the Higgs Boson.  I understood, maybe, 3/4 of what they were talking about.  Then they had a performance by Eric Clapton.  I was immediately transported to something I totally understood.  His guitar has always sung to me.  When I was in college, my roommate and I would get "altered" and listen to Cream.  I was always moved by the electric guitar and Robin's was the bass. (One of our friends said together she and I made the perfect woman.)  

Anyway, I was remembering all this when I was listening to Clapton play the guitar.  I wondered how he could stand up there for hours playing that amazing gultar and not have back pain?  He's older than me.  Then I realized that it's not painful if you are moved by the art.  I can stand at my easel and not realize how badly my back hurts until I stop.  I guess it's a remedy of sorts and I'm determined to continue doing it.  

I am trying to go through my many half done canvases and attempting to finish them.  I get about two thirds through a painting and if it's not going well, I stop and put it away.  I have so many canvases that I could rent a warehouse and have a huge show.  (Haha, I'd have to get a few of them back from family and friends.) That's about the only way I could get rid of all them.  I could do it as long as I didn't have to attend.