I have had two eye muscle surgeries since May.  Neither one was a success and I have double vision.  The last surgery gave me something called torsion which means that the image in my left eye (yes there are still two separate images) is tilted.  It's bizarre and horrible.  I'm walking around in a fucking fun house and feel nauseated most of the time.  And, needless to say, I am depressed.  

I have a painting on my easel that is all but finished, but I can't drag myself down there to put the last few strokes on it.  This sucks.

Boy, does time ever pass quickly.  I haven't written anything in here since March.  I also haven't posted any pictures of the paintings I've completed....or painted over.  I guess it just doesn't seem that important. I think it's more important that I paint.  I could do with a little less thinking, however.  Today I wondered why I had to not show people how devastated I am when they leave me.  

i'm still painting every day I have free afternoons.  I guess it took being in this amount of emotional pain to motivate me.  It seems wrong and sad

I'm still painting.  I have two new ones that are almost finished and a third that I dug out of my "almost" file.  And, I've started a new one.  It would be nice if I could just get one done.  

painting.